I am going to be a grandma. I have known for months, but today it really hit me and I cried. Once upon a time there was a beautiful little baby in my own arms and now she is going to be a mom. It is surreal. I have flash backs of this happy little person running through the yard, pretending to be a wolf, a princess, a dog. There is a picture burned in my memory of her playing in the leaves in the fall and rejoicing in the freedom of it all. I see the teen with all of the regular teenage angst, but with a head full of common sense that to me seemed unusual for her age. Her chatter brought me so much joy, the memories will comfort me when I am old.
Now when we talk she has the same fears I did, " What if I don't love my baby?" "Will I be a good Mom?" Typical and timeless fears of motherhood but more poignant when expressed by a daughter you love. I know she will be a great Mom and Tim a great father. Will I be a good grandma? Will I be someone my grandchildren can turn to when they have had it with Mom and Dad? Will I be an example of a life well lived so they have some tradition of success to follow?
My emotions are bundle of contradictions! I am thrilled, sad that life is passing so quickly, nervous about his health and well being, but excited to bounce a new life on my knee! My baby will be grown, but a new little life will bring the youthful joy into our home again.
We are blessed.
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1 comment:
No fair writing a post like that while I am pregnant! Now I have to go re-do my make-up. I love you.
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